How to Speak Your Truth, Without Letting what Others Think, Hold you Back

Today I took a pretty large step in my own self development, and decided to express a truth that I had been feeling vulnerable to share.
What will people think? Will they judge me? What if they send me hate mail?…were all thoughts that had been swimming through my head.
And low and behold, not a half hour after having posted it, I had begun to receive the very messages that for 2 years I had feared. For a brief moment, there was this feeling of embarrassment, this flash of defensiveness that I felt brewing inside of me. This inner voice that wanted to say Hey! You don’t know me, you can’t judge me in that way!
But then I remembered.
They aren’t judging me. Whatever they are feeling, has nothing to do with me, or my story, or my background, or what I have done, or did not do.
It has everything to do with them. Their background, their history, and their programming.
I’ve said this before, and I will say it again.
“You only get upset when someone resonates in you something about you which you have denied, repressed, and projected onto them, and that what is upsetting you about the other person, represents a part of you that is crying out to be loved and accepted.” — Colin Tipping, Radical Forgiveness.
Receiving this judgement, is the reason I wanted to express this truth.
Because, in my experience, this is the reason there is so much pain, illness and suffering in the world today. We are told that who we are, isn’t enough, that we have to hide, play small, be ashamed. That full love and forgiveness just isn’t available to us, because of something we’ve done in the past or because of something that was done to us.
Well I’m here to say, that this just isn’t true.
Everyone deserves forgiveness, everyone deserves deep, unconditional love. But this is something we must give ourselves first.
No one else can truly love us as deeply as we can love ourselves.
So much illness comes from not expressing our truth. Repressing our own emotions, hiding our guilt and shame. We continue and repeat the same patterns over and over again, getting trapped in the cycle, because we’re afraid to express ourselves. Afraid to be judged.
And so we stay stuck.
Believing that “this is who I am” when it actually isn’t.
At our core, we are the highest self, we are the creator, and we are GOD. Whether you are ready to believe it or not. ( I get it, it’s a big pill to swallow).
Brené Brown speaks it beautifully, that “guilt and shame only live in silence and secrecy.” She goes on to say that shame actually perpetuates a behaviour, rather than diminishing it, as we might expect. Ie. when we shame someone for something they have done, they are more likely to repeat that behaviour.
I have seen countless people create lifelong illnesses and diseases for themselves because of stories they have held onto. Because they were afraid to speak their truth, because they couldn’t let go of the past, because they didn’t know how to move forward. These people experienced lifelong pain and suffering, that they didn’t know how to heal, because of a belief, a story, a program, that they felt they couldn’t share with anyone, let alone the entire world.
Even though, it was never their fault, to begin with.
Speaking my truth, is an act of self love.
It is an act of healing, growth and development.
With all due respect, I will 100% percent of the time, choose my own health over making you uncomfortable because of something I’ve said. Because I know, that when it really comes down to it. I can’t make you uncomfortable.
You and you alone, are in control of your emotional states, judgements, and beliefs. Not me.
It is not my truth to play small. It is not my truth to stay hidden. It is not my truth to tell myself, that I cannot show up in the way that I want to, because someone else might not like it.
I know, what happens when we choose to hide our pain and emotions. And I can tell you. It’s not good. I would not wish it upon anyone, especially not myself.
What I’m here to tell you, is that there is NOTHING you have done, in your life, or that has been done to you, that cannot be forgiven.
Forgiveness is healing, and we ALL deserve it.
Holding onto pain and suffering only creates more of that thing. Holding onto judgements, only creates more judgements.
And I don’t know about you, but I desire to live in a world filled with peace. I desire to live in a world of unconditional love. I deserve to live in a world where I can show up, fully and completely as myself, regardless of what other people say about me, knowing that I was acting in integrity. Knowing that I am acting in my highest alignment. Knowing that I am acting not just, for my highest good, but for the Highest Good of ALL.
The past is in the past, what matters, is how I choose to show up TODAY.
Self actualization, as Maslow described, is the complete realization of one’s potential. This is the one thing that I desire in my life, and it is the one thing I desire for you in yours.
So my question to you is, what are you willing to let go of in order for that to happen? What story are you willing to rewrite, to reach that state. Because I guarantee you, that you cannot reach your fullest potential, by playing small, hiding, and living in the cycle of shame.
The biggest confines you experience, are that which exist in your own mind. You are more powerful than you can imagine, and whatever you’re holding onto, is the identity you created, to distract you from who you really are.
I believe, you are a warrior through and through, and it’s about time that we let that side shine.
I don’t speak my truth for sympathy, or to receive something, other than self love and self forgiveness.
I speak this message because I know, that there are good people in the world today who believe themselves to be bad, and who are unwilling to express their greatest good and fullest potential, because of something that happened in their past.
This to me, is the greatest sin. Not the thing that was done, but the suffering that occurs because of it.
We all deserve to be loved, accepted and cherished. We all deserve forgiveness. We all deserve to live at our fullest potential. We all deserve self actualization. We all deserve freedom of expression. We all deserve freedom over our own bodies. We all deserve to be happy. TODAY. No exceptions. So what, I might ask, are you waiting for?
If you’d like to check out my Video, Episode 2 of The Confessional, you can catch it here.